Never mind first love. Who can forget their first car? RIP my little Peugeot 205, with its 954cc engine and manual choke, which met a tragic end when I wrapped it around a tree. The final episode in this series of Top Gear (BBC One) focused on first cars, and a piece of research which apparently showed that new drivers (or, more likely, their parents) shell out an average of just under £5,000 for one, plus a whopping £1,900 on insurance.

The most popular choice is a Vauxhall Corsa. But what if you used that money to buy an old car instead? This was the premise put forward by Paddy McGuinness, Freddie Flintoff and Chris Harris. Cue a series of stunts to make the idea entertaining.  

McGuinness chose an MGB GT, Flintoff a VW Beetle, and Harris a Lada Riva 4×4 – all more than 40 years old, so don’t need road tax or an MOT. They drove them around a quarry, did a daft Speed-inspired race where a paint bomb exploded in the cars if they topped 50mph, and paired up with some newly qualified young drivers for the final part of the challenge.

This went on forever, but did include a priceless exchange between Flintoff and his driving partner, who loved cricket but had never heard of one Freddie Flintoff. “The 2005 Ashes – have you heard of that?!” he said, pained, as the kid looked at him blankly.

I’ve said this before, but the most painful part of Top Gear is watching Flintoff recite his script. The producers have clearly told him to make it sound like natural banter, but he can’t do it. Still, he comes across as a nice lad. The presenters always refer to each other as “lads” here. At least they seem to genuinely like one another. If they didn’t, I don’t think Flintoff could pull off that kind of acting.

Anyway, at the end, they admitted that you shouldn’t really buy one of these cars for your teenager. Quite apart from the fact they break down, they also lack ABS and airbags.

Which meant that the preceding hour was just about entertainment, not motoring advice. But hasn’t Top Gear always been that way?