Super Sophie… will have a good grasp of the loyalty rules

There are certain friends who might come to your birthday party (or God forbid, your wedding) looking a lot better than you and control the room so that you end up looking like the catering staff. SS is far too considerate. She’s not about to announce she’s pregnant at your wedding (unlike some we could mention). She wouldn’t dream of showing off about her son’s new job in the field your son is trying to break into with zero success.

She’s never going to buy the same dress as you (and then pretend she didn’t know you had one); she’s not going to steal your baby name, or make plans to meet up alone with the friend you introduced her to.

SS is not competing with you on any front because this is incompatible with the friendship she offers

Super Sophie… will be 30 per cent more grown up than all the friends and relations who rely on her (unless that person is the Queen). You may not be aware of this when you first make her acquaintance but then over time you will notice that she’s perfectly happy to be the designated driver, she has at least two fully stocked first aid kits, a survival blanket and a couple of torches in places where they might actually be useful in a power cut.

You do not have to remind SS what time to be at the airport (she’ll get there three hours ahead for any long- haul flights) and not only has she never left the oven on overnight, got trapped in a bathroom window breaking into her own flat, or had four martinis and ended up on a train to Scotland, she second-guesses those of us who are still not 100 per cent reliable. She will text you: “You know the clocks go forward tomorrow?” or “Don’t forget a handbag counts as hand luggage.”

Super Sophie… takes her social responsibilities seriously

While a lot of people are thinking about “giving something back”, SS is actually putting something back and has been for a few years now. When most of your friends decide they need more meaning in their life they join a wild swimming club or book into a meditation retreat, but SS gets stuck in to volunteering jobs – even the ones that require commitment at weekends. Even the ones where you can’t get so much as wine in a paper cup.