Who else could possibly marshal the strange Fifa universe rainbow of footballing talent that spanned from the seemingly overjoyed Cafu, through the slightly subdued Tim Cahill, to the no-me-neither Adel Ahmed Malalla?

It is frankly impossible to imagine anyone in the history of school French exchanges who would have better endeared themselves to a host family than Jenas: “Un verre de limonade pour moi? Merci beaucoup Madame Depardieu. And please do accept these flowers I brought all the way from West Bridgford by way of thanks.”

In one sense, Jenas’s agent might have pulled off one of the greatest cons in television history by booking his client to front the biggest draw in sport on Friday evening. But in another, it was pure perfection.

There are, quite simply, no safer pair of hands than those belonging to the temperate England footballer whose only top-flight red card was rescinded and would later go on to become the faultlessly mild primetime king. Like it or not, this is Jenas’s world now.