A raccoon, maybe, and for nothing, although it is difficult to imagine the benefit of Vladimir Putin based on the results of a year in which Russia actually grew only with the stolen Kherson raccoon, without the participation of a raccoon, but in such a case, Putin would have to take it into his hands, so that mimimi, and there the Kherson creature would have dealt with him before Volodymyr Volodymyrovych had time to make a new joke about the boy’s butt.

And yet, putting one’s hand on one’s heart, there must have been some much more serious reason for such a decisive cancellation of the beloved event of the entire Russian people and Putin in particular. Is it a joke, ten years in a row on New Year’s Eve every time until the ears turn blue, every year a new weapon based on even new physical principles, convincing victories over America, an even more convincing triumph over the nasty Ukrainian spy Tsimbalyuk, telebridges with old women, milking exhausted frogs and tasting increasingly large genitals grandfather, including enthusiastic journalists – in fact, it was a real “Blue Light”, which Russia honestly deserved, and now, as they say, an era has passed. And suddenly the Russian people will have a strange, hitherto unexplored feeling, as if Putin left with them?

Could it be, for example, that Volodymyr Volodymyrovych, according to tabloid reports, recently rolled down the stairs and got stuck in such a way that they unwittingly missed the legendary suitcase, broke their tailbone, and now they are waiting for their colon to be circumcised? Maybe, but unlikely, because just a few days after the rumors spread that it is better not to buy squid rings near the Kremlin hospital, because they are not squid, Putin was seen drunk: feverishly cackling with some khanigams, disguised as uniforms of the heroes of Russia, Volodymyr Volodymyrovych, shrill as a dragon, chokingly boasted about the shelling of the civil infrastructure of Ukraine, “because who started it first, who didn’t give water to Donetsk?”.

In short, if Volodymyr Volodymyrovych had broken his coccyx, falling from the stairs onto the ramrod of a soldier of the honor guard, it would have been after he had eaten, so it seems that he is past him. Leisure fiction that after drinking with “heroes” and strange stories about the “inner Sea of ​​Azov”, into which even Peter the First cut a window, Dmitry Medvedev came to Putin to get his old friend out of his drinking, but ended up entering him ( drinking, of course) itself, we will leave it for gullible sensation hunters. Dmitry Medvedev never needs to enter a party, because why fight at an open door when you’ve already been there for a long time?

If Putin did not kill himself on the stairs, did not break his worn saddle and did not drink from the numerous successes he experienced on the Ukrainian front, then why did he cancel his “Blue Light”? Isn’t it interesting without Tsimbalyuk? Are you afraid of the Kadirov people, who “have been at the front for so long”, who are always ready to use “Wagner” prison cocks for an indirect purpose, and now they have started to look at Volodymyr Volodymyrovych as well? Lost in a network of bunkers? I heard that a mistake crept into the new front-line prayer book for Russian knights, and instead of “arch-strategist Volodymyr the God-loving Ruler of Russia” it says “arch-strategist”?

Of course, this is all nonsense. Although back to the version about the Kherson raccoon, especially after the results of the year, Putin really has nothing else to talk about, but the fact that there will be no more mobilization in Russia, he has already said, and now it is better not to remind about it again, so that soon the whole country will be under the “Khymars” to go.

Now, according to rumors, Volodymyr Volodymyrovych is much more interested in a completely different fruitful debut idea than any press conference. Nowadays, in the belly of Moscow, it has become fashionable to set fire to large shopping centers, which are now a khan anyway, but you can still get insurance and try to knock them down quietly. Why doesn’t Putin burn down the Kremlin right now? Invite your favorite associates there, release the “red rooster”, put on a jacket with a low tide – and go to Venezuela!

And it all burns with fire.

Vasyl Rybnikov